


I Found

by lordofthesith



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Character Death, Emperor Hux, I am so sorry for this, Kylo Ren Angst, M/M, Submissive Kylo Ren, honestly
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-16
Updated: 2017-03-24
Packaged: 2018-05-27 00:36:48
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 5
Words: 7,730
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6262459
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lordofthesith/pseuds/lordofthesith
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The destruction of Starkiller base leads to chaos, but nothing can compare to what it leads to within the confines of the First Order. Hux is power-hungry and Kylo Ren is too dependent on the highest power there is. At the death of Snoke, something planned by Hux for a very long time, the world seems to be falling apart. Kylo Ren is breaking apart at the seems and only seems to be held together by his unwavering faith in Hux. Unbeknownst to either of them, this is the road to Ren's fall and Hux's damnation. This is a road with an end that neither truly see coming.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Warning Sign

**Author's Note:**

> Beware the Ides of March! It was entirely unplanned that I would start this fic today, but here we are. I posted a short version of this on my blog and, after much screaming and begging from people who loved it, I wrote. There are still chapters to come and I will try to post the regularly. This fic is best read with "I Found" by Amber Run, which it is based and named off of.

 

**_And I'll use you as a warning sign_ **

**_That if you talk enough sense then you'll lose your mind_ **

* * *

 

Ren was panting, shaking even. Hadrian Brendol Hux stood next to him. He looked clean cut and as calm as ever. Before them was the shriveled form of the once great Supreme Leader. The smell of death and burning flesh hung heavy in the air. Kylo straightened finally, looking at the corpse. They had done it. Snoke was dead and Ren was free. It was something he had wanted for a long time, ever since the murmured words in his ear that had come from the general who now stood at his right. He had wanted this so badly, bad enough to join forces with Hux to complete this mission; but now, standing in front of the corpse of his former Master, he didn’t feel victory or completion. He felt lost and helpless. Why? The question slowly consumed him as they travelled back to the Finalizer.

After the destruction of Starkiller base, the First Order fled to the outer reaches of the galaxy. Their main base became the Finalizer as Hux and Snoke had begun plotting their next course of action. In secret, Hux had come to Kylo and their relationship had developed quickly. Unbeknownst to Kylo, Hux had, and still has, a terrible knack for manipulation. Kylo was no fool, of course, but was easily swayed by simple things. He was a man who thought he was above baser instincts. Eating, sleeping, fucking, they were all beneath him. Hux knew better. He used this idea, simple touches or a lack of, to make Kylo pliable. When Hux was satisfied that he had less of a hindrance towards Hux, he began guiding him. Whispered words spoken in the dark of the night, in the heat of pleasure. _You can be so much more,_ he told Ren, _and all you would need to do is join me in defeating Snoke. It’s so easy._ Praises were something Snoke had given scarcely to the knight. Hux had found this out after years of poking, trying to find the Supreme Leader’s weakness. He was a man of ambition, after all. Eventually, after weeks of gentle persuasion, Ren caved exactly like Hux had expected, finally coming to him in the middle of the night and asking him simply what his plan was. That had started his climb to greatness.

It had taken nearly two cycles to drag their plan into fruition. Faked reports of rebellion sympathizers as an excuse to scout for Snoke’s planet, Ren insisting that he was ready to be trained, tracking communications with the Supreme Leader…these were a few of Hux’s methods. Eventually they had located the planet and brought entire legions of troopers there for the battle. And now…here they were, Ren feeling lost and confused, and Hux with a maniac gleam in his eye. They reached the Finalizer and kept the whole affair quiet. Ren was powerful and easily manipulated the minds and memories of the Stormtroopers so that they had no idea they had just killed the Supreme Leader. Later on, there were a few cases of Stormtroopers remembering the battle, but they were all quickly and efficiently disposed of.

Now came the next course of action for Hux. He assumed that he would have to kill Kylo after killing his master. The promises of power and control he had swayed him with were all lies. He would need to somehow best the knight of Ren. Days after the great event, Hux was knee deep in a plan when he was interrupted by Captain Phasma, who reported that Ren had not been seen in days. Hux was seething. The knight had probably vanished from the ship, off to destroy a planet or otherwise cause Hux pain and suffering. Rubbing his temples, Hux ordered a full scale search of the ship.

He hadn’t left. They found him hours later, curled up in the holochamber. Hux strode in, sharp eyes boring into Ren’s back. He was a pathetic like this, crumpled and shivering. The fact that the knight was reduced to this, though, sent up red flags in the general’s mind. He strode around Kylo until he was in front of him, looking down on him with a clear air of distaste.

“Lord Ren,” he started, his voice loud enough to shock Kylo to scrambling gracelessly to his feel. His hair was mussed and the scar across his face was an angry red again, like it sometimes was when Ren scratched at it. “You haven’t reported in to me in nearly four days. You have avoided all forms of communication, verbal or otherwise. Is there any reason I should know of that require have to send out search parties to find you?” He raised an eyebrow, his lips pinched into a thin line. His words sparked an anger in Kylo. It was easy enough to see in the stiffness of his shoulders and his cut of his eyes. Hux could practically hear his teeth grinding.

“I apologize, general. I do hope that I did not cause any difficulty,” he said, pushing the words through his teeth. Hux didn’t flinch. It was the waver of his voice that would have gone unnoticed had Hux not known Kylo so well. He held back a smirk.

“No, none at all. I had just assumed you would be somewhere else rather than groveling at the feet of a dead Sith Lord.” Hux felt a small spike of fear that he quickly clenched as Ren launched at him, shoving him with his back against the wall. The knight’s hand was outstretched, tendrils of the force wrapping around Hux’s throat, though not hard enough to cause him my worry. “Release me,” he growled, his eyes locking on Ren with quiet anger. Ren held him there for a minute longer, obviously warring with himself. Finally the grip snapped back and Ren practically snarled at him, storming out. Hux cleared his throat and straightened his jacket. He wouldn’t be swayed by a petty display of the force.

This had all been an observation. The pieces fit together simply. Ren had been withdrawn in killing Snoke, retreating as soon as soon as they had reached the Finalizer. That, coupled with Ren’s longstanding, unwavering loyalty in Snoke would easily add up to one thing, something Hux could have only dreamed of. He started off down the hall.

It was a few days until he ran into Ren again, now masked and cloaked. “Ren!” he barked, “I need to speak to you about our strategy.”

The mask turned to him and fell into easy step beside of him. “With the death of the Supreme Leader, I feared you had forgotten that were are still at war.” Hux’s steps never faltered. Clearly, Ren was now trying to subtly prove that he didn’t care that his master was dead, but Hux knew better. He emitted a hum of acknowledgement before turning into a conference room. It was empty and dark inside the room and Ren’s steps faltered. Hux turned to him.

“I know why you were there. I know why you do not feel any sort of triumph at the death of the man who held you for half of your life, who manipulated you beyond though and beyond reason. I know why.” Hux had the knight’s interest now. Hux allowed a smirk to tug at the corner of his lip.

“Why is that, General?”

“You cannot be without a master.” It was like a blow to the stomach. Ren wanted to lunge at him, wanted to choke him and tear him apart for suggesting such a thing, but he found himself frozen in place. His breath came in almost shuddering gasps. It was like he was bared open to the general, torn into pieces and broken. A few words and he was broken and shuddering. He took a minute before he opened his mouth to speak, but Hux cut him off. “You simply move on to the next highest force in the galaxy, isn’t that right, Ren?” He raised his chin, eyes narrowed coldly on him. “Take off your helmet,” he ordered.

It was the snap in his voice that did it for Ren. It was the realization that Hux was the next highest thing in the galaxy, the most dangerous force, and Ren had no chance, no choice. He reached up and removed his helmet, then hesitated. “Place it on the table,” Hux instructed. Ren did so, this time without hesitation.

“Kneel.”

It was a simple command, something Ren had done so many times before. He didn’t want to. He was strong, stringer than Snoke or anyone else. Why couldn’t he just have his freedom?

“Please, general, don’t do this.” He had a feeling of dread in his stomach, like the only thing that could possibly come from this was pain.

“Kneel,” he said with more of an edge to his voice. This time Ren did. He sunk to one knee in front of Hux, head bowed. Hux grinned then fully. If he could control the famous Master of the Knight of Ren, and therefore the Knights themselves, he could conquer the galaxy.

And conquer it he would.


	2. Focal Point

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> With the Supreme Leader gone and Kylo Ren at his feet, Hux take the next step in his path towards galactic control. Hux is a power-hungry man, that hunger which can only be sated by forces which he cannot control.

**_And I'll use you as a focal point_ **  
**_So I don't lose sight of what I want_ **

* * *

The former General of the first order stood on the balcony, overlooking thousands, if not hundreds of thousands, of his troops, officers, and the senators from the First Order’s allies. He was dressed in finer clothes than usual: a suit with a new golden belt, the sleeves wrapped in gold bands. On his upper left arm was a band with the insignia of the first order. Over all of it was a high-collared cloak –- lined with red and giving him a bright, pale appearance –- that fanned out behind him on the cold stone of the balcony. He stood stiffly, hands folded neatly behind his back.

At his right was Ren. He was clad in his usual robes, but with the addition of a new cloak that nearly touched the ground, but not quite. He was unmasked for the first time in front of everyone. His anonymity had been ripped away from him and he had been thrust like a trophy in front of the entirety of the First Order. He struggled to keep his mask of calm.

“The Supreme Leader had fallen,” Hux started, his voice booming over the people gathered below. He was the vision of pride and confidence. “Supreme Leader Snoke was plotting against the interests of the First Order, fighting against our plans to bring order to the Galaxy. In response, he was bested by the might of the First Order and by the strength of its soldiers. I will take my rightful place as the Imperial Commander of the First Order and soon of the galaxy itself. We move unrestrained now. No one, not even the Republic or the pitiful Resistance can stand in our way now. With me as your Emperor, there will be no delay in the death of those who seek to destroy us. There will be Order brought upon the Galaxy.” He turned then, looking to the knight of Ren, whose head was bowed, shoulders shaking with the effort of staying put. Hux allowed himself to feel pride for this. “Come here, Ren,” he snapped. Ren did so without hesitation, walking up to him just as he’d been instructed and dropping to one knee. Kylo felt sick. He had no idea what Hux was going to say about him. Hux lifted one hand and stoked it gently through the Knight’s hair. He looked back to the crowd, knowing there was fear in their hearts at the display. “Even the great Sith Lord, Kylo Ren, will bow to me. He submits to me like a dog to his master. Is there doubt in your hearts now for me? Is there hesitance?” He pauses. He can feel Ren trembling beside him. Kylo feels sick. “Beneath your new emperor, the Galaxy will kneel! All will bow to the First Order!” There was a collective movement as all the troops and officers below raised their arms in salute.

Kylo somehow made it back to his room before emptying the contents of his stomach into a disposal unit. He was shivering, coated in a cold sweat. He was nothing more than a dog, a pet to his new master. He vomited again, tasting only bile that stuck to the backs of his teeth. He wanted to stay in his room forever, to never move from it again, but he should have known that Hux would find him. Kylo awoke in the middle of the night to find Hux next to him, stroke his hair almost lovingly. “You did very well today, Kylo,” he murmured, his voice rough. Ren was shaking again, fear splitting through him. He had never been this way before, never even with Snoke, but there was something about the ease with which Hux controlled him that scared him more than anything ever had. He was frozen even as Hux’s hand slipped from his hair to his neck, trailing down to his back. His finger slid over the bumps in his spine, but Kylo did not move away. He couldn’t bring himself to. Ren fell asleep to Hux cooing praises into his ear, just like he had before this massacre of everything Ren had held dear.

Hux had planned the little event out to every point. He had originally planned for Ren to speak, to verbally declare himself to Hux, but Hux realized that he didn’t trust the man to speak. He was too chaotic, too unpredictable. Hux had no way to tell what he would say. The shock he knew Ren felt, the new respect, it was all worth this small show of affection towards the broken Knight curled up at his side. But Hadrian was not familiar with the warmth in his stomach. It was not arousal, nor was it pride. It was something Hux had never felt before but knew it immediately. There was no room in his plan for love of any sort. He certainly could not spare a relationship with someone as distasteful and pitiful as Kylo Ren. Although, acting as if he cared would certainly give him more control over the Sith. Perhaps he could act. Perhaps.

The morale of the troops was noticeably higher, though perhaps so was their fear. Hux couldn’t tell, nor did he care. They were quicker, more efficient now. There were no more thoughts of defecting, reported Captain Phasma, and troops followed orders with less resistance and less hesitation. It was a singular, powerful force. They took out Resistance bases easily. The more time Ren and Hux spent near the battle, usually wrapping things up and killing the commanders, the more Ren trusted him. Ren was a powerful Sith, more powerful than Snoke had ever been. It came to a point at which Hux could look into the eyes of a traitorous Resistance officer, speak a word, and the officer’s heart would stop, crushed by the will of the force. Hux reveled in his control over Kylo. Three cycles after Hux declared himself Emperor, the planet on which the remaining resistance resided was destroyed, and the First Order now ruled over the entirety of the galaxy. Hux himself knew the ways of being a good leader. Every other one, even the Empire, had had it all wrong. The key to good leadership was not fear alone, but also respect. Hux was fantastic at winning the respect of any in his path. Respect was something that Hux gathered. Fear was something that Kylo Ren invoked. They were always side-by-side, the master and his guard dog. Ren had grown used to being on Hux’s leash. He even came to enjoy it. They were a terrifying pair. Kylo constantly had tendrils of the force stretched out, sensing the thoughts of the people around them. At one point, a senator from Nal-Hutta attempted to assassinate Emperor Hux. Because the Hutts were cowards, she poisoned the Emperor’s food. Hux had barely looked up as the senator dropped over dead, only ordering that he be brought different food, as that was poisoned. It was disappointing, to say the least.

Kylo was devoted to his Emperor in every single conceivable way. He trusted the general like nothing else mattered in the galaxy. Deep in his heart, curled like some dark snake, he held affection for the man. He was powerful enough to control Ren, something he knew he not only needed but craved. He wanted to be controlled so completely that he no longer felt the war between light and dark, just the indisputable truth that he was owned by Hux. Kylo had lain with him, of course. He had done so back when Hux was merely a general and Kylo was crushed by Snoke and by the weight of his own battles. Even then, he had known somehow that this was how he would be. This was his fate. No, it was his destiny.

Hux was a hungry man. Hungry for power and for order. He had spent his entire life plotting out how to control. The Stormtroopers were his pride. He had such control over them, simple words dictating what they did. But Hux wanted more, so much more. He wanted control over them at a deeper level than just their minds. It was helpful to have Ren at his side to do his bidding, but it was a poor substitute for having power of his own. _He_ wanted to be able to say a word and their heart stops. _He_ wanted to close their throats, punish them if they refused to follow his orders. Most might had thought that Hadrian Hux had reached the top of the galactic scale. Most might see him as the most powerful being he could possibly be. Hux knew otherwise. The simple fact that he relied at all on Kylo Ren spoke truths that he knew he must change. He knew that, to have this control, he must unlock the secrets of the most powerful thing in the galaxy: the Force.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kylo Ren seems to be suffering from Stockholm Syndrome. Poor dear.


	3. Talk Some Sense To Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kylo Ren, loyal to Emperor Hux, begins his trek to find a way to make his Emperor force-sensitive. His trek leads him to an Old Jedi Master, who warns him of things to come. Ren finds a way to bring his Emperor into the bindings of the force, which leads him to the very center of the galaxy. This is the path he must take, but where will it lead?

  
**_And I'll use you as a makeshift gauge_**  
**_Of how much to give and how much to take_**

* * *

 

It was proven how deep Kylo Ren was into his own submission when Hux asked him about becoming force sensitive. Kylo never had any question, not even a flicker of doubt, at the odd question. He simply began thinking about it, all the way through his training with Snoke and even back to his time with Luke. When he couldn’t think of anything off of the top of his head, he nodded dutifully to Hux. “I will find a way, Emperor Hux. It will be done,” he said. Hux always noticed that, even with however much control he had over the knight, Ren never dropped his eyes. He never submitted, not like that. He had his pride, however much of it still belonged to him. Hux let it slide. He, for once, felt as if he felt like he had enough control here. Perhaps it was a hindrance in his heart. A blockade that told him where to stop, where the line was that he couldn’t cross. He loved Kylo, he knew that now, but he would never admit it, wouldn’t let it affect him. Hux was a man whose mind was plotted out as perfectly as blueprints. He allowed himself one exception to loving Ren: he let him keep his sliver of pride. From there, Hux could relax and exert the perfect amount of control over Ren to keep him from fighting back and to keep him in line. It was a controlled system. He learned from others that allowances had to be made. The stress caused by constantly expecting perfection was ridiculous and almost always ended in downfall. Hux would not allow downfall, so a system was made. One each problem, each new part added to his life, there was one allowance. He allowed the crew to enjoy relaxing occasionally, to drink and jest and most likely complain about him. He allowed the officers to offer their opinions of topics. He allowed each ambassador one outburst each. He allowed Ren to keep his pride. It was simple. Efficient.

But Ren didn’t get one allowance, and Hux knew that. Ren was loyal to him, yes, but he was still Kylo Ren. He had fits, outbursts, was blatantly disrespectful. Now it was more controlled. When Ren went into a rage, all Hux had to say was his name and the shoulders were straightening, his saber retreating. Hux allowed this display of emotion as well. He also allowed the nights they spent together in elated ecstasy. It was always hot as messy and loud and neither said anything about it because they both loved it. Ren always snoozed afterwards, curled up beside Hux, and Hux always smoked. He wouldn’t lose that habit if it killed him. It was the same way every time they fucked. But that was not every night. Hux knew he was in deep when Kylo never stayed in his own room. He slept next to the general, relaxed, waiting for something to do. He never whined about it like he used to. He just sat on the couch or lay on the bed, nothing more than another ornament in Hux’s room. He dressed better than he used too as well, per Hux’s request. That had been one of the few battles Hux had actually had with him. He said (and Hux would never forget it either), “You will _not_ dress me up like a corellian whore!” Hux had kept THAT image in his head for the next week, something Ren knew and hated him for it. But Kylo had, eventually, caved. His dress now was supple black cloth draped like a robe. Intricate designs swirled around the sleeves so long that they almost dragged the ground. Bands wrapped around his throat, snug against the skin. Kylo only agreed to that so that he could hide the marks on his throat and neck. Hux had marveled when, finally, he could see Ren’s long, pale fingers without the obstruction of the gloves. He was beautiful, really. He was forced away from the sanctuary of his mask and now walked, unveiled, for all the galaxy to see. He had hated that part especially but, like everything else, had grown used to it.

Kylo Ren started his quest to find a way to make his Emperor force-sensitive almost as soon as it had been assigned. On his transport out into the galaxy to search, he couldn’t help the giddiness that rose in him. He and Emperor Hux would be closer than ever if Ren was able to successfully make him force-sensitive. He started by remembering back to when he learned what the force was from Luke. “Midi-chlorians are microscopic beings that live inside your very cells,” he vaguely remembered Luke telling him. He needed to know more. Those were the path to making Hux into the man he was destined to be. His first stop was on the planet Dathomir. After the final defeat of the Resistance, Luke had been locked away in the Dathomir Imperial Prison. He requested to see Luke, stating that he was under orders from Emperor Hux. They moved him quickly. Finally, Ren was alone in a room with the aging Jedi. He was surprised that Luke had lasted this long. Luke looked up to him as Ren paced around to the table, finally sitting across from him. There was silence for a minute. “Ben,” Luke said quietly.

“Don’t call me that. Please.” It was closer to a plead and had less of a snap to it. It was evidence of how broken Kylo Ren was.

Luke merely sighed and resigned. There was no chance of bringing Ben back to the light side, especially now that there was barely a light side to come back to. He had heard the rumors, of course. _The Emperor’s dog,_ they called him. Luke saw it now, but he would never sink low enough to call his nephew that. He still love him, no matter what. That wasn’t something that went away. “You need something from me,” he stated blandly, “for your Emperor.” Ren nodded.

“I know that you told me about Midi-chlorians when I was young. How do they work? Where can you find them? Can they be transferred?” Ren asked, eagerness seeping into his voice.

Luke didn’t need any more to piece it together. Hux was using him to become force-sensitive. “My boy, you cannot do this. This is a dark path, darker than you know. Please-“ Ren extended a hand, a snarl in place.

“I will find out myself then,” he growled. Luke never made a sound, though he fought with all of his strength. It took a while for Kylo to reach the information he wanted, then he dropped his hand and his power. He stood, shoving the chair back. Luke sat, panting slightly, in the chair. Ren headed for the door.

“Ben,” the name stopped him, “I know that you love him. I know that you would do anything for him. I don’t need the force to see that. Just know that he does not, nor will he ever, love you back. He would end you without a second thought.” Ren left quickly without responding. The old Jedi’s words followed him all the way to Coruscant, where they resupplied for the trip ahead. He couldn’t quite shake the words. They haunted him like a twisted nightmare. His devotion, however strong, couldn’t help but be shaken by this.

He was to travel to the Force Planet, a planet very close to the center of the galaxy. They traveled through a bright, almost blinding nebula to get there. Ren was, for once, completely at peace. Light or dark, he could feel the power than was all around them. It only strengthened when they broke into the planet’s atmosphere. It was strangely barren, it seemed, but Ren knew different. He could sense the life around them, surrounding them. He went onto the planet alone. He had never experienced anything like this before. The sheer power, though he dared not to touch it. He almost feared that it would consume him. He strode aimlessly around the barren wasteland, noting that occasionally, geysers sprayed forth energy that dissipated like mist. He could see a temple in the distance that he slowly made his way to. He stood out against the gold coloring of the planet in his black robes, so unsurprisingly, there was someone waiting there for him. The beings that he saw were light and bright, and he could feel the emotions that radiated clearly from each one. Anger, Joy, Confusion, Sadness. The one who was in front of them all, the being that was the largest, radiated Serenity. They turned and moved into the temple, and he followed without question. _Kylo Ren,_ he heard, though from where, he didn’t know. _Ben Solo,_ another voice spoke, softer this time. He felt a spike of anger. It was dampened by Serenity. _You come for the sake of your love,_ said the Priestesses, _You come for midi-chlorians to make him one with the force._ Ren nodded silently. _We were hesitant when we saw this, but we have seen through the force that this is the path you must take._ Ren hesitated then. He walked with them until they reached a pedestal on which stood a small glass vial, shining with light that he knew would be brighter had the planet itself not been made of light.

“Priestesses, may I ask what this path leads to? What will happen?” He was worried. He couldn’t place why. _This is the path of redemption,_ came the answer. _The redemption of the galaxy and of every living creature in it. Do not fear it, but travel along it. Trust in the force._ He swallowed thickly. “How am I to know that I am on the path?” _You will know._ Serenity handed him the vial and he could almost sense a smile from her. Almost. _Give this to your lover. He will drink it and the path will be set in stone._ Ren nodded and, at a second thought, bowed. The Force Priestesses were usually only seen as legends. It was an honor to be able to me them. He turned then to star back to the ship when he found himself in front of it. He turned again and the temple was gone. He paused to look one last time on the planet before boarding the ship.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Luke Skywalker made a surprise appearance! In case anyone is interested, I didn't make up any of that. There's actually a planet in the center of the galaxy called the "force planet" inhabited by nothing but 5 Force Priestesses and midi-chlorians. I now know too much about Star Wars. Oops.
> 
> Also, I might not post until next week *gasp* because I have a fashion show at a con that I am running on Saturday, and won't even be in town until late Sunday night. But! Then it's my spring break and you will get lots and also don't tell anyone but I might start another fic with Senator Ben Amidala


	4. Where It Wasn't Supposed To Be

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> All Men have breaking points. Very few of them refuse to show it. Kylo has found a way to make his Emperor the most powerful man in the galaxy, and he would never hesitate to give him that power. Hux's dreams are now fulfilled and he rules over the galaxy in a display of awesome power. But this means that changes must be made, as they always will be made.

  
**_And I found love where it wasn't supposed to be_ **  
**_Right in front of me_ **  
**_Talk some sense to me_ **

* * *

 

 

Emperor Hadrian Brendol Hux was a terrifying man all on his own. He was feared by all and, at the same time, respected. But no one could have possibly imagined at Hux could climb any higher. _Grand emperor,_ they said, _how much more powerful can one man be?_ But there was one more step, one last power to add to his collection: The Force. It was something widely regarded as a myth, but it was said to flow through everything. It was a temptation a man like Hux couldn’t ignore. It was his weakness, his downfall, that drive for power. He craved it like air, and many feared he would go mad. Hux, though, was perfectly sane and still as cunning as ever. After sending his pet on a hunt, he finalized his plans. He set up a senate, composed of the larger civilization that was under his rule, not that any were outside of it. By the time Ren returned, he had the senate finalized and it was a great weight lifted off of his shoulders. The senate was, of course, completely under his control. It was the guise of democracy that allowed him to rule the galaxy. Hux’s manipulation in the way of his ruling was enough to bring any of the senators who opposed him to their knees. In a few cases, the senators met with unfortunate accidents, but were quickly replaced. No one suspected the Grand Emperor

The hunger in his eyes was visible when Ren stepped off of his ship. It grew and spread when Ren told him that he had been successful. A day passed and Ren appeared before his emperor in his throne room. There he climbed the steps to his throne, to his master who was so perfectly placed on his throne, cloak spread out like great wings. Ren knelt at his feet, head bowed just as he knew Hux wanted. He reached into his robes and extracted the vial that shined like the stars. Hux would have gasped it he had been a weaker man. But in lieu of a gasp came the hunger, strong and ravenous. He felt like a Gurrcat, ready to pounce. He inclined his head, a permission for Ren to move. Kylo stood gracefully, offered him the vial. Hux took it from him and, head raised and shoulders back like the prideful man he was, drank from the vial. The light in the room left them in darkness. Not a breath broke free of either man. Kylo felt it first. He remembered later thinking that it was much like the cracking of an egg. It started with small slivers of energy, power that had not been there before. It spread, the cracks of the egg opening wider, until it all broke forth like a great flood of light. This time Hadrian _did_ gasp, a sound ripped from him at the feeling. The power surrounding him was intoxicating. To other force-users, the feeling of being submerged in the force was one of awe and something that humbled them. This was not the case with Hux. He felt drunk of power, tears nearly welling up in his eyes at the sheer awesomeness of it. He leaned back in his seat. Ren opened his eyes, not realizing they had ever been closed. He felt something in him turn at the sight of Hux, spread languidly on his throne, mouth parted in a half-gasp and eyes bright. He looked as if he was shining from the inside. It leaked through what pale skin shown, through his eyes which were wide and unblinking to the world. It was an image Ren wouldn’t forget.

Hux didn’t move for four hours, simply losing himself in the force. Ren stayed with him all this time, worried as one who was close to another might be. When he became too worried, Ren reached into the force and drew Hux out carefully, making sure not to anger him. He was afraid Hux would become lost in the force. It was quite an experience, one that most natural born force-users rarely experienced. Hux was a powerful force-user. Ren trained him as much as his emperor would allow, and found that Hux was equal, or perhaps greater, in power to Ren’s own. Ren taught him everything, from digging into people’s minds to force-lightning. The Emperor listened attentively and learned quickly, though of that, Kylo was not surprised in the least. Hux was a man of strategy, and chances are he had the entire thing planned out in his mind already.

Hux was the most powerful man in the galaxy. He felt settled, his constant drive finally gone. He was no only free from his obsession, but he could now rule in a way that would have made his own father quaver. There was no need to worry over a clone army anymore, as people now lined up in droves to join the militia of the First Order. He was satisfied in every sense but one, and that one was a piece of him he either refused to acknowledge or did not even know existed in him. But that did not matter. To Hux, satisfaction in every way than one was a far greater achievement than any other he knew. He had reached the level of godhood. He found, in his trek around the galaxy, that many groups, mainly in the Outer Rim, _did_ in fact worship him. They saw him as a god, and they made themselves ready to serve his every need. While on these planets, Emperor Hadrian liked, as any man would, the attention he received from these people. He also found himself oddly disquieted by their devotion. He couldn’t pinpoint why, but he supposed that a piece of him still existed that harbored a shred of humanity. He quashed the feeling. He made his journey through the great capitals of the galaxy, securing the devotion of his citizens and the loyalty of their leaders. When he returned to the First City, Ren was waiting on him, loyal as ever. Hux had needed him to stay for the very specific reason of that he needed to think of an idea, and he could not risk a slip up in his thought process. Hux was the most powerful man, and the only reason that he had kept Kylo Ren by his side was because of his affiliation with the Force. Now, Hux was a force-user. He had no use for Kylo. He would say later that it had not been an easy decision to come to, because many in his empire had grown fond of the dog at his heels. It had been painfully easy, in truth.

Hadrian didn’t want to kill him publically. The knight had been loyal, and he deserved that much. Emperor Hux called for Kylo to be brought into one of the rooms in the citadel. It was a barren room, built of thick stone and unfurnished. Ren came in, unmasked as per the Emperor’s wish. Hux looked at him with his usual cold demeanor, hiding the truth behind his mask. “Kneel,” Hux murmured, and Kylo did so without hesitation. Hadrian unclasped the blaster from his hip. He almost never wore a blaster, finding that is was unseemly and unfit. He had a better weapon now, anyway. He raised the blaster to Ren’s head, the weapon powering up. Kylo didn’t look up, his eyes on the shined boots of his emperor. Hux’s finger moved.

It should be mentioned here that neither man truly knows. The piece of Hadrian Hux that he cannot identify is not, in fact, humanity. The loyalty of Kylo Ren is not simply blind loyalty to a master that gives him next to no choice. The force flows as it always has in both of these men. It ties them and binds them in a way that is deeper that spiritual, deeper than anything that exists in the known universe. Deeper, even, than the force. The thing that binds them is fate herself, inescapable and total. Fate bound these two souls together from before their birth. From the beginning of time, these two sounds have been bound and held until the moment came that they were thrust into the world of the living and drawn together across the mortal plain. These two men have no knowledge of it, but their devotion to each other could only be understood as love. They were never meant to acknowledge it, never meant to bring it to fruition. Their love is a poisoned one, a tainted thing that was born so that it could die. Hux’s humanity is his love for Kylo, Kylo’s loyalty is his love for Hux. Their love manifests in such ways that no one could ever have seen that it were alive. Their love came in Kylo’s protection of the Emperor, his devotion in every step, and his willingness to do any task that Hux commands. It came in Hux’s care for Kylo’s needs and wants, his want for the knight’s council, and the softness of his heart in the silent moments between them. Their love was one that was born to feel wrong, to be poisoned and tainted and senseless. Their love was not meant to be. It was meant to die.

 

17 years after the battle of Gamorr, Grand Emperor Hadrian Hux executed the former Knight of Ren and Right Hand to the Emperor, Kylo Ren.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One more chapter left. If you feel the need to come chat with me, or scream, or perhaps you like this and want to see more, go to my tumblr blog kyloren-sithlord. It's also an RP blog, so basically it's endless fanfiction. Enjoy!
> 
> (also i edited the lyrics at the beginning of chapter 3 because i didn't plan this out and also these now fit better)


	5. I've Missed You More Than I Thought I Would

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kylo Ren, Right Hand to the Emperor, is dead. Rumors abound about the relationship between the two, but these are of no consequence to the Emperor. He does not care for his former lover. He never could care.

 

_**And I've moved further than I thought I could** _  
_**But I missed you more than I thought I would** _

 

* * *

 

Hadrian Brendol Hux was the most powerful man in the galaxy. Perhaps, even, in the history of the galaxy. He was perfect in every way, ruthless and unstoppable. He orchestrated the downfall of the Resistance and the rise of the new First Order, and led the galaxy into a new era of peace and prosperity. Insurrections were nearly unheard of. Some said that was because of peace throughout the galaxy; some said it was because the Emperor was too powerful. Perhaps this is why Emperor Hux was seen as a perfect man, god-like and untouchable. _He killed his own lover,_ people whispered in dark alleys, like they were afraid he might overhear, _what sort of man does that?_ The rumors only got more confused when word spread that the former Knight had been buried and, in his tomb, a statue with a heart of Kyber had been erected. It seemed so sentimental for the man who had ended his life without a second thought.

Hadrian Brendol Hux was not, in fact, perfect. He was flawed like any other sentient creature in the universe. The only one who knew him as a flawed being had been Kylo Ren, the former Right Hand to the Emperor. Kylo Ren had known that he was mad, power-hungry in the worst way. He remembered reading a myth somewhere that one civilization believed that the end of the universe would come when the great snake finally consumed itself, taking the universe with it. Hadrian was very similar to that snake. He could not resist the idea of the immense power of the Force. The Force is not what most would say it is. It is not a tool to be used and manipulated to one’s will. It is a living thing, though it does not breathe. There is not Dark and Light. The Force pulls in those that tread too deep, uses them as its tools to take lives and feed on the energy. Those who tread deep into it become less alive, become more and more like a puppet for the Force to use freely. Kylo Ren did not understand this, so it is reasonable to say that neither did Hux. He didn’t expect to _feel_ Kylo Ren’s life wink out in an instant, to feel as though his own heart had been torn from his chest. He had gasped and fallen to his knees, leaning over the body of his former lover.

The Empire of the First Order was running smoothly. But, in the aftermath of the execution, reports began to come out. Small ones that were quickly dealt with, but some not quick enough. They were speculation, at least that’s what the Empire said. Nothing more that speculation and outlandish rumors. But doubt had been planted, doubt that said that the Emperor was descending rapidly into madness, lost over the execution of his lover. They said that the guilt of it was consuming him. Hadrian did not take well to these rumors. In a fit of anger, he ordered that any such reports were to be destroyed immediately, and their writers along with them. He still appeared at galas and meetings, looking pristine as ever, unphased by the condolences dealt to him. He told them lies, that Kylo Ren had betrayed him, or that he had begged for death at his lovers hand. No matter what, Emperor Hux brushed off any allegations with such ease and grace that soon the questions came to an end. It seemed that everything was back to the way it should be. The Empire was perfect in every way.

Of course, it was Phasma that first noticed the changes. They were in deep discussions about the mining project on one of the outer rim planets and how it could benefit the construction of better ships. One of the lead engineers looked over at Emperor Hux, whom he had been addressing, and slowly came to a stop. The Emperor was gazing distractedly into space. Phasma leaned over and muttered “Sir?” Hadrian started, blinking quickly. He looked at the engineer and scowled. “Can’t you all handle this yourselves? I have better things to do. Dismissed!” Everyone, save for Phasma, scampered quickly out of the room. She looked at him as he sighed and stood, walking over to the viewport. He looked out, pale eyes reflecting the light of a nearby nebula.

“Emperor . . . are you alright?” she asked. She was a friend, at least she hoped she was. She hoped he would trust her.

“I’m fine. You’re not my caretaker,” he said, but it lacked bite. She hesitated again.

“Sir, perhaps you should take a break. Go somewhere away from here. We can manage without you, you know. You could use it. All of this stress if having an effect on you.”

He would have snapped at her for saying _anything_ about stress affecting him, but he didn’t. “Perhaps you’re right. Perhaps I need some time away.” She nodded dutifully.

“I will arrange it, my liege.” She turned to walk away from him. He stood as still as a statue, still looking out onto his Empire. He ruled all of this, everything he could see and more. But why didn’t it feel like he thought it would.

“Phasma,” he said just as she reached the door. She turned expectantly. “Four days. In four days, it will have been a year since . . . since he died.” She hesitated, knowing that he hated condolences. Instead, she turned on her heel and left the Emperor looking out onto the universe.

It was not a surprise when he picked the planet of Kylo Ren’s burial. Phasma had known that it was coming. He only arranged to stay for a few days, then he would move on to something more relaxing. He sent his schedule to anyone who needed to know. The people of the galaxy didn’t need to know that he was going on a vacation. It was a security hazard, among other things. They packed his things while he arranged what would happen while he was gone. Phasma would be in charge, as she was the highest ranking officer under himself. He was glad that she would be in change. She was almost as tough as he was, and she had a level head too. A day later, he shook her hand and gave her a salute before boarding his ship, off towards the undocumented planet.

The Force is a wild and uncontrollable thing, but it is not cruel. It allows those who have served it to live on, even those who were consumed by it. Kylo Ren lived on in the Force, watching down on those he loved. He watched as Luke slipped silently away from the living, much like his master. He was held by his mother for the first time since he had been young. Finally, in the Force, he should have been at peace. She should have been. He watched with pain in his heart his former lover struggle to keep his mind clear. He ached when he saw Hux sit silently in his room, lay on the bed and wish for a warm body next to him. He saw Hux stand at his own grave, looking at the statue that held in the center of its chest a red Kyber crystal. He wanted to hold his love in his arms once again. But he knew more than anyone that the Force was a mysterious thing. He still did not know the path that he had set in motion, the one that Hux was following so closely. He would never truly know where it led.

18 years after the battle of Gamorr, Grand Emperor Hadrian Brendol Hux was found dead in the tomb of Kylo Ren, curled at the feet of his former lover.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry, first of all, for how long this took. Literally almost a year. I was keeping you in suspense!
> 
> That's all, I'm sad to say. I enjoyed writing these two, even if this was the most depressing fic I've ever written. Don't worry, though, it's bittersweet. They're together now in the Force. 
> 
> Thank you all for sticking with me, and thank you for your sweet comments! You are all the reason I could make it through this!


End file.
